The People Who Saved Me
There is a saying 'nobody is coming to save you', that is used when you get stuck in life. This is one of those that I have believed for most of my life. Even the concept of being saved made my skin crawl. I've always been the one to pull myself out of situations, emotions, and challenges. Alone.
2 weeks ago I was proven wrong.
I experienced a near death encounter at the hands of domestic family violence. Got diagnosed with an incurable progressive disease. Became homeless. Filed police reports. Started new medication. All in a week.
In the middle of everything I told someone that I choose to live. Which is strange coming from me. I have been so fixated on death my whole life that admitting that I choose to live was terrifying. At the same time my mind clung to the concept of death and I became very heavy. Existential ideas filled my brain and I felt more scared than ever.
But people came to save me. And it wasn't the people you would think. These people didn't have to help. They didnt have to try. And the had no obligation to even care. Which makes their help more special. They probably didn't even know what to do, what to say, where to go. Yet still, they saved me.
One let me sleep on her couch
Another drove me there in the middle of the night
A snack run and kmart trip followed
Movie nights to create normalcy in the chaos, a few of them helped me with this
Dinner out so I could eat something warm, each meal had laughs on the side
Someone gave me a lift to look for a new house (which worked!)
Hugs when I needed them, from so many of them
Crying down the phone with them
They brainstormed ways to help, places i could sleep, things to get me by
They asked questions about my diagnosis to better help me
Taking over shifts when I was sick or scared
Helping me move into a new home (Next week!)
They stayed honest with me even when it was hard
Messages every day, just because
One even got me sunflowers
Those are just a few of the things these people did to save me. And some of them might seem trivial. But without them, I wouldn't be here. They saved me. And I am not alone. No act was greater or less than another, without knowing what to do these people saved me.
To the people who saved me,
Thank you. That's all. Just, thank you.
This is written for my friends. These are the people who saved me.
-Jen xx
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